The Boston Celtics aren’t your average employee, but I thought it might be amusing if someone could write an article treating them this way. All we need is someone who works professionally in the world of human resources and has very few hobbies or interests outside of basketball and work. In other words, we need a boring corporate drone. This is where you come in.
A performance improvement plan, if you’re lucky enough not to know it, is a tool (weapon) that HR uses to train (intimidate) an employee to perform better. Often identifies the employee’s weaknesses and provides helpful guidance (strict directives) on how to improve (or otherwise) the employee. And with that background I present to you the Boston Celtics’ Fiscal Year 2024 Improvement Plans, complete with company terminology!
You can see the performance improvement plans for Bus 1 Boys here.
Writer’s Note: These are written like an annual evaluation; It came off very negative as a strict PIP. Bear with me here, folks!
Malcolm Brogdon
Section – rotation seat
Role – the sixth man
- It is so great that Malcolm was recognized by our professional organization as the Sixth Man of the Year. Great job playing yourself, Malcolm!
- While Malcolm was great individually last year, we’re not sure the way he played leads to the team’s long-term success. We love that Malcolm is such a confident player, but he needs to be more of a team player. Sometimes the best thing you can do is pass the ball and look for your open teammate.
- We believe Malcolm’s constant reliance on self-reliance is a fixable mistake, and we’d be remiss if we didn’t mention that self-reliance and isolation at the workstation are issues for most of our team. Malcolm has the talent – the confidence really is. He needs to do a better job of delegating tasks to others, like three open corners and touchdown passes, if he really wants to take the next step at Boston Basketball Inc. Last year it was Malcolm’s lowest assists percentage and assists per 100 possessions since he graduated from college in Milwaukee. If Malcolm is not able to change his mindset and share his workload, we may have to engage in more discipline, up to and including termination.
We wish you a wonderful summer!
Derek White
Section – starting lineup
Role – Combo Guard
- Derek has achieved 2nd overall defense this season – what an achievement! We’d really like to see Derek get a little stronger so he can take on bigger wingers like Mr. James Butler in the future. But overall a great job, but there is always room for improvement. Again, great job, but don’t let it stop you from getting better!
- We’ve discussed mindset with some of your co-workers who are in a similar role, and like them, we think Derek could really benefit from a slight change in mindset, but in the exact opposite direction. The only person who doesn’t realize how great Derrick White is at basketball is Derrick White. We want to see more of this:
Impossible, Derek White has been taking this shot for the past 12 months. Bam on the moderately difficult closure in ECFs. His improvement as a shooter was one part form and one part confidence. Also, this is a pretty nice offense in general. pic.twitter.com/JbwobIZgRZ
– Wayne Spoony (@WSpooney) June 12, 2023
- Less of a delay to Derek please. We don’t want a fake pump and derrick tiger. We need a fake pump and Derek’s money. If Derek is not able to change his mindset and becomes more aggressive, we may have to engage in more discipline, up to and including dismissal.
Marcus Smart
Section – starting lineup
Role – point guard
- This has been an up and down year for Marcus. There were definitely some highs (high career assisting percentage, gold star!), but also some uncharacteristic lows. Marcus is the tallest member of the team, but it’s never too late to continue growing. Ensure you value your Clifton strengths and maintain a growth mindset.
- One of the places we’d like to see Marcus improve is in something he’s always been elite at, fending for himself in isolation. During the regular season Marcus was never slightly below average, he was just awful in isolation. It was in the 16th percentile – that’s not good. Last year, he was ranked 94th in defense isolation. It is not surprising that Marcus was in the DPJ last year. We believe falls are a combination of issues that include injury and exertion.
- Marcus Smart defines our team’s style with his efforts. We want to get back to historic defensive levels next season, and Marcus is key to doing that. We know the defensive effort is still there, he’s been in the 92nd percentile defense loner going into the playoffs, and we expect to see them throughout the season next year. If we don’t, we may have to engage in more discipline, including dismissal.